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portion control

Phobia-Free Portion Control or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Scale

By Michael Harris, PhD

Phobia-Free Portion Control

or

How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Scale


Portion control. Ever wonder just how much is enough? Have you looked down at your plate at home or in a restaurant and wondered if you REALLY needed all that food? Did you eat it all anyway?

Here is hoping I can help you figure out the how and why of the mystery of Portion Control!

First and foremost, as I have mentioned over and over again on the radio, you will need a scale. Otherwise, you are playing the guessing game. That’s just not gonna help you! What do I recommend? Digital all the way. You want accuracy, especially if you are not dealing with a large number of calories per day, every partial ounce counts.

I have a couple of recommendations based on cost per unit. Click the links below to see what I recommend. I use the OXO Stainless Steel unit, but I use it every day, all the time. You may not have the same need or desire for that kind of cost unit.

            Top End: OXO Good Grips Stainless Steel Food Scale with Pull-Out Display

            Mid Range: OXO Good Grips 5-Pound Food Scale with Pull-Out Display, Black

            Budget Range: Cuisaid ProDigital Digital Kitchen Scale (Silver)

Caloric Needs

Once you have determined your caloric needs and the amount YOU need per person, start weighing stuff. You will be shocked when you start doing it. What will you be shocked at? Just how much the pre-cooked weights might be… Most recommended chicken servings are 4 to 6 ounces. Most commercially processed and sold chicken breasts are 8 to 16 ounces! Quick lesson? How do you trim down a chicken breast? Weigh your breast, determine how much you need for a final weight. Lay the breast on a cutting board. If you need a 4-ounce breast and you have a 12-ounce breast, you can cut down in thirds. Lay the breast out, skin side down, lay a sharp chefs knife down flat to the board, 1/3 of the way up the breast. Start slicing slowly. For safety and your own comfort, hold the chicken breast down with your hand in a plastic container to put pressure on. Cut down from the fat side to the point, trying to keep the cut even all the way to the end. Weigh your final product. Practice will make perfect on this type of application.

Not only do you have the ability to weigh your pre-cooked ingredients, but you also have the ability at home to weigh your final products! You want to know how much starch and protein you are serving. Your needs will vary.

Take Control of Your Plate

Now that Chef/Minister Jett has preached from the mountain about the use of scales, let’s get to the hard stuff. How do you control what you eat when someone else is plating your food?

Over the last 20 years, restaurant plates and by the same right home plates have increased on average from 10 inches to 12 inches. That is actually a 25% increase in the amount of food that can be on a plate! You pay the bucks, you want a full plate in front of you, right? We have been conditioned since youth to “clean your plate”. I remember being told about the starving kids in Africa. How do you beat the plate growth problem?

Leave Food On Your Plate

First, don’t be afraid to leave food on your plate. There are very few restaurants that are not willing to box up or doggie bag your leftovers. Realize that there may be 3 full meals worth of food on that plate! Your average fast-casual restaurant will serve the equivalent of 2 or 3 servings of protein, 2 servings of starch but usually only a single serving of vegetables.

Second, you can play tricks on your body. The brain has a built-in time delay. It takes on average 20 minutes for the brain and the belly to communicate. This goes back to our primal scavenger nature where our ancestors were scavenging the plains for grub. You had to eat quickly and lots of food before the other predators come for either what you are eating or for you. So… Take your time. If you are eating solo, use that high tech distraction device (smartphone) and read a book between bites. Read my blog here or Play Angry Birds. Whatever you need to do to slow yourself down. Put your fork down between bites. If you make the mental effort to put down your fork, you will slow down what you eat.

Have a Conversation

If you are eating with company, have a conversation! If you allow your body the time to process what you eat and actually STOP when you are satisfied instead of when the plate is empty, you will be shocked at how much will be left on your plate.

A couple more tricks? Drink a glass of water before you eat. Your body will feel full more quickly if you drink a glass of water and eat a starchy item. Bread, or rice, or potatoes will quickly expand in your stomach, and you will feel full quickly. Similar concept to the “full bars” that were being marketed a few years back.

Last trick for this blog?

Treat your plate like you would for a four-year-old. Cut the food into bites in advance. You will see just how much food is actually there if you cut down your proteins and starches into bites. It will allow you to take the time in eating and will make you considerably more aware of the volume of food you are eating.

Last bits of information for you guys. Dr. Michael and I closed the show today talking about what I call free foods. American diets and eating habits have evolved to the 3 big meal per day system. Your body has a hard time processing that volume of food in any given sitting. A successful weight loss program will very often involve eating smaller meals on a more frequent basis. If you knew you were doing it or not, you were. Think about your average office day. Eat a big breakfast, eat a big lunch and likely some kind of snack in between from the vending machine, or the donuts that Jane Helpful brought for the break room. You do the same thing after lunch before you hit the road. If you are tracking your calories or points, those snacks can kill you!

Cut back on the big breakfast and lunch! Oh yeah… Free Foods? Weight Watchers has a great system in place. They promote the use of what they call Power Foods. These are fresh fruits and vegetables and select other foods that are 0 points. These food products do contain calories, but also contain a considerable amount of fiber, which the human body cannot digest. There are lots of calories on those items that are locked up on the non-digestible fiber. I tell people that fresh raw fruits and vegetables? Don’t count those in your calories!

Back next week to talk about basic activity levels.

like this audio? send me an email about why?

hybridgear

T-shirt review for my new Hybridgear shirt

By Michael Harris, PhD

T-shirt review for my new Hybridgear shirt

Hybridgear is now my go-to sportswear for yoga and strength training. Just wow!

I love to work out… if you are a big guy (I’m 6’1″ about 220) you already know how difficult it is to find quality workout gear that is affordable.

Hybridgear is now my go-to sportswear for yoga and strength training. Just wow!
You may not have people trying to send you stuff by I do occasionally and I’m always in for a free t-shirt.

Boy, was I surprised at the quality comfort and usability of this new shirt? Doing 90 minutes of yoga in ANY clothing can be an exercise in humility. Those clothes get wet and soon you feel like you have an extra 20 pounds to lug around with you for the rest of the yoga time.

Not so with this shirt. It wicks away the moisture and allows you to feel light and dry even though you may be sweating (duh, yoga).

Check out this clothing line for all of your sports and outdoor needs from my friends at Hybridgear.

here’s the link – http://hybridgear.com/

hybridgear

I’ve checked the rest of the website and I will be buying additional stuff. I do have a penchant for hoodies and long sleeve pullovers. So for me… winter’s coming!!!

Here’s the video review they asked me to do

Need Help with Yoga or Strength Training?

Feel free to email me or just call 214-702-3774 anytime for more information

lower your weapons

Lower Your Weapons… But You Don’t Have To Let Go

By Michael Harris, PhD

Lower Your Weapons… But You Don’t Have To Let Go

Lower Your Weapons. That’s what my tantra coach told me the other day. My first response was “what the hell are you talking about”? My normal mode of being on this planet is very male-oriented. I can shut off my emotions so quick I haven’t even noticed. I can say this has been a problem in some of my relationships in the past and I’ve resolved to make a shift to the brighter side of the force. So I decided to give it a try.

I have BIG MALE energy but moving into the feminine side can be a challenge. So the idea of “lowering my weapons” sounds not only strange but kind of dangerous.

She (my coach) told me a story of a conversation with her former other about some kid stuff. She set her intention of lowering her weapons (being defensive) and just having a conversation about some information she needed to have. Remarkably, for the first time, she was able to have a civil conversation and the exchange was concluded without incident.

lower your weapons

Yin/Yang

Yang (male) energy is that black/white, off/on, right/wrong style of energy that currently pervades our planet. You can see at a glance what it does to our society, education, finances and the list goes on. It has its place but anything in excess can be too much and cause imbalance.

Yin (female energy) is soft, inclusive, and collaborating energy that I believe we need more of, particularly men. We (men) get so locked into the fight. Who is winning with no way of knowing that if we do win the earth has been scorched and no one can live there anymore or at least for a while? Is this really the way you want to be in the world?

lower your weapons

Give It Try

So I decided to give this a whirl for the next 50 years or so. I have been meditating and doing some trance work with the idea of lowering my weapons in mind. I’ve noticed that I’m calmer, more open but I still feel a little bit of trepidation (okay, sometimes a lot) from time-to-time. Old habits, I suppose. You have to give people the opportunity to notice that things are different. We all want to feel loved, honored, appreciated, etc., but are we also extending that love and appreciation out to others? 

Ask someone you know and trust to let you know when your wall goes up (defenses). I have employed several people I know and respect to, in essence, call me out when I’m being a d#ck and have stopped listening. Imagine that you have your weapons of mass destruction and feel yourself lower them to the ground. You don’t have to let go but you can definitely feel the shift in your body.

lower your weapons

Here’s An Exercise

Think about someone you wish to have a conversation or interaction with, that in the past, hasn’t gone so well. Set your intention to lower your weapons and just talk. Be sure to listen to what they have to say as well and if you feel your walls going up… breathe. If they are already up… lower them if only a little.

1. Tell the person what you are thinking

Be open and honest about your thoughts and make sure that you remain respectful and civil during the process. No one likes being yelled or cursed at. Be as clear as possible about your thoughts without blaming or making someone else wrong for having opposing thoughts.

2. Tell the person what you are feeling

Take a moment and really feel whatever it is that you are feeling. Is it Shame? Guilt? Fear or anger? what is the name of this emotion? Where do you feel it in your body? What would happen if you allowed yourself to feel that?

3. Thank the person for listening

It isn’t necessary for you to get an agreement or for the other person to change their position. It is necessary that you speak YOUR TRUTH as about you, your feelings and your place on this planet.

lower your weapons

Here’s Another Way

Not all exercises are relevant in all contexts. Here’s a quick way of doing the above exercise on the fly in any context.

If you feel like you have been wronged, slighted or unheard, try this.

Say these words…

When you …….. (fill in behavior)
I feel…………….. (fill in emotion)
Because……….. (state reason or thinking)
I need………….. (state what you want or need)

This doesn’t mean that person will give you what you asked for but it does mean that you have stated your reasons for your request. Have a position of expectation. This process works really well in almost any situation.

lower your weapons

Need Some Help?

If you need some help with this exercise or just have a few questions
just call 214-702-3774 or email me any time

tinder date

Treating Your Business Like a Tinder Date?

By Michael Harris, PhD

Treating Your Business Like a Tinder Date?

Treating your business like a Tinder date is probably the best way for you to have a lousy business. Also, you get to stay poor and have very few customers. Go ahead… ask me how I know? That’s what I used to do.

We, coaches, therapists, and alt-helper industry people have a tendency to take ourselves and what we do VERY SERIOUSLY. As a result, do our level best to almost starve while helping a few people as possible.

tinder date

So What Is A Tinder Date Business?

Unless you’ve been living in a parallel universe you’ve probably head about dating sites like Tinder, Zeus, Match, etc. The whole premise is that you fill out your profile and the computer or A.I. is supposed to match you up with the perfect person. Simple right? Except for that people lie, exaggerate their accomplishments and minimize their faults all so they can fall in love without having to do any work on building a relationship.

A Tinder-style business is pretty much the same way. The people find you through advertising, Facebook or some type of Groupon coupon and expect to receive the magic of your products or services at a discounted price.

tinder date

A Word of Warning

The problem here is you. You don’t believe in your business. You do not believe in your own worth. And you have attracted the type of person(s) who are looking for your products or services at the lowest price. But there is hope.

What if I told you that you are the most amazing person with the highest skillset in your industry? What if I told you that you could charge double, triple or more for what you do? AND because you’d have fewer customers you would have the time to develop long-lasting relationships with those customers; who in turn would tell their friends about your services. That’s exactly what I’m saying.

tinder date

It’s About The Relationship

Thousands of years ago (in the 1990s), I used to own personal training business. At one time I had 2 gyms, a half a dozen trainers and more income than we could spend. How did we do that? With a team. I had one person whose sole goal was to watch the money. I had another person who was probably the least fit personal trainer I’ve ever seen but his clients loved him. And my job was to do the marketing and the intake of every client who came through the doors. This model worked!

We knew the name of every client, their spouse’s name, kids names, etc. We had a relationship and that relationship was built around the client’s goals, not ours. The client’s stayed not for weeks but for years.

What kind of business could you build that was designed for the client’s goals and was also designed to build a relationship with that client for a decade?

tinder date

A Funny Thing Happened

Maybe less funny than peculiar. At 41, I sold my gyms and retired. I didn’t retire for long. I had always wanted to go back to school, get my graduate degree and finally, be become a therapist. So I did that.

I was good at what I do and I helped a bunch of people, even saved a few lives. But something else happened. I started to take myself, what I do and my business VERY SERIOUSLY.

Then I focused more on marketing. I got a Groupon. I ran ads and specials through my newsletter. And it worked!!! It works so well that I had sold my soul to the gods of commerce and forgot why I got into this industry in the first place.

tinder date

What Does Your Business Want From You?

That was the question one of my coaches asked me. I didn’t have an answer and I felt silly, embarrassed confused, etc. How does one ask their business a question? Well, it turns out I’m pretty good at trance. I just supposed that my business was an actual human and started asking questions. 

What was her name? (Yes my business is a girl and  her name is Ophelia, lol)
What did she want from me?
What changes did she need from me?

Then I asked what did I want from this relationship?
What did I need back from a long day of working with clients?

Slowly the idea of creating something new began to emerge. So as I’m writing this I am also creating a completely new business. Yes, it will have hypnosis and coaching, but it will also include the other things I do and love. Yoga, strength training, tantra intensives, shibari, and ichinawa intensives, individual and couple’s intensives and I’m going to charge enough that I don’t have to work 24/367.

tinder date

Is It Risky?

Is this risky? Probably. Isn’t this what we ask our clients and customers to do? To just put it all out there and just see what happens. Maybe this will work. Perhaps I’ll have to expand in some places and contract in others, but isn’t that a metaphor for life? The only thing constant about this world that we live in IS CHANGE. The worst thing I could do would be continuing to act like my business was a Tinder date, right?

If you truly want to use the words, authentic or real or whatever words you use. Perhaps the best way to begin is with yourself. Are you your own best customer? You should be if you aren’t. Do you follow your own advice, protocols? What might happen if you started living the way you wish to instead of wishing you could?

If you need any help expanding your business model, living your dream or just coming up with a better plan.
just email me or call 214-702-3774 and let’s have a conversation. I guarantee it won’t be boring.

target your mind

Target Your Mind… The Body Will Follow

By Michael Harris, PhD

Target Your Mind… The Body Will Follow

Target your mind? What does that even mean? It means that without a target your mind won’t have a specific thing or goal to accomplish. We get so locked in our heads that our bodies don’t have an outlet for any fun.

Our conscious minds are goal oriented. Since you were born you’ve been told to make your bed, brush your teeth, etc., over and over until… boom! It becomes a habit and it’s automated and we no longer have to think about doing something it just happens. This is a great thing. If you had to remember what a door looked like it might be difficult to find the bathroom in the middle of the night without these automated processes, right?

target your mind

The Down Side of Automation

When was the last time you did something new? The real downside is that we have automated processes. That may seem counterintuitive but really when was the last time you did something completely new? We drive to work the same way, we kiss the same way make love on the same night in the same position for the approximate same period of time… we are automated. This also extends into how we shop, what we keep or throw away and the list goes on.

target your mind

Find A New Target

I want you to take on a challenge, TODAY. (not later or next week) Pick a “something” that you’ve always wanted to do needed to do or were too scared to do… and do it. Call a friend and tell them to help you. Ask your coach to help you find a NEW SOMETHING. John Grinder used to challenge his NLP colleagues to do something completely new each year. They [NLP’ers] would climb mountains, go to a drum circle, learn a new language but it had to be something they knew nothing about or wasn’t an existing skill.

 

Make A Plan

It doesn’t matter to me if you clean out a closet; that has been needing it. Buy a new wardrobe or go skiing in Argentina in the Summer. We, humans, need variety in our lives. Variety is one of those 6 fundamental human needs. Most of us have become some engrained in our behaviors we don’t even notice them anymore. If you need help with this just ask your spouse or friend about doing something new that they “just know” you’ll say no to and say “yes”. Even if you know you’re going to hate it, do it anyway. 

Make an agreement that you are going to do this new “something” and put it on the calendar and do it. Who know it you may actually have fun by accident. You might discover that you did indeed, hate doing that and that means you don’t have to do THAT anymore. The real purpose is to boost your brain cells with new experiences.

target your mind

Watch Your Kids and the Grandkids 

Kids are easy. They don’t need a reason, a goal or any other thing just to do something and have fun while doing it. They are completely in the moment and have no preconceived ideas about what going to happen next. My favorite story is me watching two boys ride their bikes on top of a fence. Obviously, no one had told them about gravity and luckily they didn’t get to find out about this thing called gravity during the time I was watching them. They were just having fun. My wish for you for today is… that just for a moment you no longer remember there is this thing called gravity and you can fly as high as you are willing to flap your wings.

Need Help?

Might sound crazy but some people need help or ideas on how to do something new or just play. If you are one of those please feel free to call me 214-702-3374 or email me anytime

people are awesome

People Are Awesome

By Michael Harris, PhD

People Are Awesome

People are awesome if you are willing to watch them. I have an opportunity to be with some of the most wonderful people on earth. Yes, that means you too. I’ve decided to create a section where I can tell stories, adventures, and successes of those I have the privilege to know and work with on a daily, weekly, monthly and sometimes only a one-time basis. This section will include friends, clients, hypnosis and coaching stories.

people are awesome

Sage your Living and Working Space

I have lots of friends/colleagues who are what might be described as from the “OUT THERE” part of the world. They are healers, coaches, tantra or sex coaches and psychics. They burn candles, eat healthy, smoke pot, do hallucinogens, run intensives and other things that may be perceived as out of the ordinary.

The one common thread between all of these individuals is that they frequently burn sage to cleanse and clear their homes and offices. I’ve known about this. I’ve even done this from time to time when the energy in my house gets creepy but until this weekend I’ve never considered this as a daily ritual.

The Request

I had a friend of mine coming over on Saturday and she asked me a question. She asked if I saged my house after people came over and would I do that before she arrived. I did do that. The visit was pleasant, as expected but here’s the fun part; I noticed. I noticed that something was different about my home environment.

Then yesterday, I had a partner come over to my house after we went to the movies (We saw Dumbo). When we got to my house, I asked her to wait on the porch while I saged the house. Again, a great experience.

Whether you believe or not; try this as an experiment. Sage your house and/or office, every day, for a week, to notice if you feel lighter or more refreshed as you return to your home. If you see people, clients or customers or if you work from home, just notice if there is more positive energy around your workspace.

There is a lot to read on the internet about the benefits of sage and clearing your space.

You can buy sage just about anywhere even Walmart.

Here’s a link from Amazon if you like me and want to just have it delivered.

people are awesome

Accept Gifts

Right now… a friend of mine is on her way to Las Vegas. She called me this morning at 5:30 am (yes, I’m usually up then) to say a friend of her’s from New Orleans was about an hour away. He wanted to take her to breakfast and “oh, by the way” they were going to Las Vegas and would she like to go all expenses paid?

She is in a unique position. She is currently unemployed, has a residual income and no other responsibilities, at the moment. Why wouldn’t she go? It took a little convincing but she is on the road and I’m getting the occasional “selfie” as they make their way across the US.

When the universe offers you a gift… ACCEPT THE GIFT

WHO KNOWS? MAYBE YOU’LL BE OFFER MORE OF THEM

people are awesome

5 Love Languages

The final story is also something you may wish to incorporate into your life. The 5 Love Languages has been around for years. I’ve read the book but until now I’ve never gone to the website or taken the quiz.

I am adding this to my coaching program, my couples counseling and from this point forward into my personal relationship(s).

This is such a simple tool that can take the mystery out of why your friend, partner or sullen teenager is having an issue with you. You may not be speaking in a language they understand as love.

TAKE THE QUIZ

Discuss it with your partner, friends or family. Have your employees take the test and really take the time to study the answers to the quiz. This is so much cheaper (FREE) than getting a divorce, losing a job or family member over something you could have fixed in advance.

Thanks for reading

I’ll talk to you soon

If you have any questions feel free to call 214-702-3774 or email me

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