Personal Change Work for Generational Healing

Personal Change Work for Generational Healing

Personal change work is needed for any problem or situation where YOU want the change to occur. It is neither the role or the responsibility of the other person, family or organization to change. That may seem confusing for people. We live in a world where the expectation is. “if you loved me enough… you would change”. This not only is ridiculous, and selfish, it’s also unfair to place your expectations on someone with or without their permission. I’ll bet I’ve said those words 10 times a week for the last twenty years, and yet, occasionally, I also am guilty of this.

In my last article on generational healing, personal change work is the second needed component for generational change. If we are to create lasting change within our family we probably need to get our own stuff handled first.


What Changes?

For life changes of this magnitude, we need to look past the normal types of problems. Things like dissatisfaction with current television programming, your team lost last week, the lawn mower won’t start, etc. and begin to look for repetitive problems. Repetitive problems like picking the same type of spouse or partner. Getting very close to a raise or promotion and then “something” happens. Repetitive or persistent illness. 

Sometimes the person is so embedded in his/her patterns they can’t see them. It’s time to ask friends, family or a neutral third party for some insight. I say insight because you aren’t asking for a diagnosis, or to be fixed; you’re asking for feedback. You might want to re-read the article on Boundaries, before you start asking for pattern identification, just saying.

Repetitive Family/Relationship/Work Patterns

Once you get the idea about repetitive problems you will begin to see them everywhere. Perhaps your family’s pattern is to get sick or have a crisis during the holidays. Perhaps there is a pattern of consistent layoffs or firing for some “unknown” reason. Think family curses.

My personal family has a history of blue-collar or low-medium income professional employment,so money and related health problems abound. Another interesting pattern is when someone gets butthurt or isn’t getting enough attention, it’s okay for them to manifest an illness or short-term injury. A few of my family members have managed to take this to a new level and require surgery, in order to get the attention they seek.

Different families have different problems and agendas. In order to free yourself from this generational pattern, YOU are going to have to clean your stuff up first. Take some time and decide if these patterns are still serving you or if they are just something you learned by growing up? Once you’ve found a pattern… OWN IT… and then CHANGE IT.

Now What?

If you have identified a pattern in yourself now, might be a great time to discuss personal change work. There are lots of methods available. I personally think hypnosis and NLP are the best, but I want to give you a list of options. 

Short List:

Depending on the type of change you need this list might provide some solutions and avenues you hadn’t considered. Keep in mind, whatever you believe will work best for you; probably will.


traditional medicine, dentistry, psychology, psychotherapy, chiropractic, acupuncture, physiotherapy, pain management, etc.


taking or teaching a class, seminar, weekend retreats, etc.

Sports modalities:

personal training, amateur or semi-professional sports, sports coaching


Reiki, massage therapy, alternative healing, tantra, etc.

Spirituality related modalities:  

 alternative healing, shamanism, ministry, singing, chanting, meditation 


finance management, change management, team building etc.


hypnosis, NLP, coaching, weight management, etc.

personal change work

One Way Of Change

Any of the above methods may work for you to get the type of personal change that you desire. But I don’t wish to leave you hanging, so here’s one method for you to try. This is a video of one of the audio I give to patients for homework.

The premise is simple. There is something that was lost, taken from you or you just left it behind in order to survive your childhood. It’s time to get “THAT” back. Just watch and listen to the video and let me know what happens in your life. You may want to watch this video several times. Global change happens quickly but it doesn’t happen in one minute. Enjoy.


personal change work

Need Some Help?

Need help in identifying a repetitive pattern? Or maybe you just have a few questions.

Feel free to contact me via phone at 214-702-3774 or email me, anytime.


Additional Reading:

Unhealthy Family Dynamics, The Dangers of Not Talking

Healthy Vs. Unhealthy Families 

Can You Change Unhealthy Family Patterns?