5 Ways To Grab Mediocrity From The Jaws of Victory…
There is so much that has been written about how to set goals, how to have a stellar life, make more money and achieve happiness, I wonder sometimes if it is just so much that people have “tuned-it-out”. Or, maybe they really don’t believe that a great life is possible for them. And then there may be the very small percentage of people who actually don’t’ want to achieve anything… but I doubt it.
I think, sometimes, that people fail to realize that every thing they do has a consequence. Whether that consequence is negative or positive can be based on opinions, beliefs, values and sometimes time. You never know what the outcome of something is until some time goes by and what can seem like a failure, a wound or a tragedy can frequently become a person’s greatest resource.
1. Set easy goals or better yet, have none
The mind must have a target; even a small target, like get out of bed, in order to have a direction, for the mind to follow. Without a direction, the mind will entertain itself much like the animals that you see at the zoo. The pacing, rocking and anti-social behavior displayed isn’t a normal way for animals to act, but they are so bored that many are mentally ill and could not be returned to the wild.
This happens to humans as well. We live in boxes, drive in boxes and go to work in boxes so we can return home to our boxes where we sit, eat out of a box and watch a box (of flat screen) so we can repeat this the next day. GET OUT OUR YOUR BOX!!! Your mind AND body need routine but they also crave diversion setting a goal to play with your children or take the spousal unit dancing might be just what you need to discover that GOALS ARE IMPORTANT TO LIVE.
2. Stay in line and follow the crowd
In any tribal system, including our “modern society”, there is a requirement for some type of order in that society. But remember the goal of the society. The goal is for the people in power to stay in power and for the people who are not in power to provide the general workforce, stay in line and not disrupt the system. Which is a GREAT IDEA if you are in power, but what if you’re not?
Every single innovation in a society was first met with resistance, isolation and ostracization before the new idea was accepted and generalized into the society or tribal culture
What if you don’t want to go to an office and work until you’re 55 and just before you retire they fire you and steal your pension? What if being a lawyer, teacher or “whatever” but it’s expected of you and since your parents and grandparents were that… do you have to do that too? GET OUT OF THE LINE, TAKE OFF YOUR BELL… that crowd you’re following is heading for the cliff.
3. Focus only in one area of your life while ignoring all the rest.
With the modernization of our culture, we have become more specialized. So much so, that the average “modern” human doesn’t know how to forage for food, find shelter, build fire or really, anything else except do the job they were trained for and consume. The offshoot of this is we focus on what we know and ignore everything else. For example, a man who may be very good at what he does at work, may spend ZERO TIME WITH CHILDREN, thinking that someone else (aka his wife) will do that since he is working. The problem with that is two-fold. Not only do his children not have an opportunity to learn from their father, he also has no opportunity to learn form his children. Having four daughters I can tell you there is a lot you can learn form your kids, particularly how to play and have fun. This isn’t very high on the list of things you do at work.
REMEMBER THERE ARE 8 DIFFERENT AREAS OF YOUR LIFE and work is only one of them (the other 7 are: personal environment, finances, intimate other(s), friends and family, health, personal growth, fun & recreation)
4. Pay attention to what “other people” will think
I wish I had a nickel for every time I heard my Mother say, “What will other people think?” This is a modified version of the above a category where you need to stay in line and follow the crowd, with a slight twist. The twist comes from the fact that once people have “decided” who you are, they really aren’t that interested in you doing a whole lot of changing. That would require them to remove you form the box they put you in and actually consider you as a person instead of an object.
When people start saying “I don’t know you any more” you’re a definitely on the right track. The further you move from a recognizable you the closer you may be to your goals
5. Use only vague or non-committal patterns of speech
As well as our society moving into more specialized forms of work and further away form self-sufficiency, we have also moved away from DIRECT SPEECH AND TRUTH TELLING. In primitive times, in times of crisis and on the battlefield being direct, telling the absolute truth isn’t only necessary it could mean the difference between life and death. Not so in our current evolution. Our leaders lie, spin conversation and we wonder why it’s begun to trickle done to our families and children.
Vague conversation (sure, maybe, etc) and non-committal conversation has become the way we talk and it’s killing our culture, our family and our basic way of living. Telling truth is so rare today that you could become a celebrity just by telling the truth about everything you think and do. Who know? Perhaps you could get your own reality show.
If you want to have a real life where people you love trust you TELL THE TRUTH AND MAKE COMMITTED STATEMENTS. If you say you’re going to be home at 5:30 be home at 5:30. If you tell the kids they are going to the water park and you wake up with a cold… go to the water park. If your wife asks you “if her butt looks big in these new pants” and the answer is yes… tell her yes. The consequences of telling the truth may be something you aren’t used to experiencing, but once you have developed a habit of telling the truth people will stop asking you for some BS platitude and come to you when they need to hear the truth. The same is truth for others around you if you ask for the truth, expect to hear it and except no more vague or non-committed answers… THE TURTH WILL SET YOU FREE
I’m hoping that with this that you will see some or part of things that are holding you back from achieving your goals. Goals aren’t always easy, they require work and take time away form “Dancing with the Stars”, but the last time I checked that show was sending out paycheck for watching their show.
About the author:
Michael Harris, PhD, internationally known hypnotist, transition coach, speaker and author is an expert in language of communication of Sensory Stacks. He is active locally and nationally, including private and public speaking on the Mind/Body Connection, Hypnosis and Sensory/Learning Styles. See his latest video on YouTube and on Healthy Mind & Body radio to make an appointment call or just to ask a few questions call – 214-702-3774